Last Monday That Matters

This Monday is the last Monday before the competency exam. I told the Mrs. yesterday how my body and especially my legs had been super sore for the past several days. I told her I didn't know what it was from, because I hadn't run for the past 4-5 days, and prior to that I was hitting around 35-45 weekly mileage running. So, not knowing what was going on with my body, because usually my legs feel quite fresh after taking consecutive days off running, she told me she thought it was stress from thinking about the compentency exam so much. Whatever the deal is with my body, I would like to see it end, cause it actually kind of hurts, quite ridiculously in fact. Only a few days left that matter, and we'll if I fail miserably again at life and fall flat on my face. I'm such a privilaged person, living in America in our day in age, and yet I still wish to be a big baby and consider these past couple years of my life to be a brutal beating emotionally, mentally, pyschologically, and physically. However things turn out, I think this experience proves I'm a weakling.

Too early to think of anything brilliant to put on here, so I'll leave you with something I was contemplating a couple of days ago. A lesson I obviously I have not yet learned. A man was told to fill up his vessel with water. As soon as he finished doing it he was told to look into the basin and report what he saw. He explained that he saw nothing. Then he was instructed to wait until the water ceased to move and look again. Looking again into the basin, this time into the undisturbed water, he reported that he saw his own face distinctly.