Success?

Success. The word is elusive. The word makes me lose sleep to be quite frank. When do you know something is godly and God-driven in my line of work? When is it not the best human logic and thought with human tags of "success" and when is it stamped with God's approval as "successful." It is more than a bit disturbing trying to pin down what should be deemed as successful when doing ministry. Is the American Christian church culture close to reality when it defines success? I hope so, that would make my sleepless nights needless, and the ungoing mental energies expended on this topic totally unnecessary. However, I fear this is not the case. I must resort to a critical eye on these matters. In our depravity we sometimes forget how far our minds have fallen. Popular definitions of success finding acceptance in the majority of people's minds I find having no home in mine. Therefore, I must scratch even the most compelling definitions of success and suspend posing an answer until more thought is developed.

Is success in the Christian life easy to come by, no. Then, why should I think success comes any easier in my ministry job? The simple answer is that I shouldn't. When the majority seeks to believe the best, I know that I am depraved and am anything but good. Sure, sure, people can say this and that about my "extremist" stance, but ultimately I think that all of our lives experientially attest that wickedness still has a comfy home inside each of our hearts. So am I successful at my ministry job and my Christian life? I think the answer can be ultimately found when I answer the question of "How well I pick up my cross daily and follow Christ." When my conscience can answer this question with peace and ease, then maybe I'll be more prone to see things in more rosy colored glasses.

What does a successful College Age Ministry look like? The criterion I choose to measure the success is inevitably bound to tamper and taint the results. But I need to know if I'm moving in the right direction, or if change is needed. What I do know is that I'm too prone to think ministry matters as successful far too often and let myself off the hook far too easily. Now, others may see me as otherwise, but I contest still that depravity has me letting myself off the hook of responsibility far too easily and far too often giving myself a congratulatory pat on the back when quite the contrary is warranted. If depravity still reigns inside humanity, then I'm still prone to pleasant thoughts and self-delusional successful thoughts. And if people are tempted to say that I'm deceived the other way, this being that I don't see success enough, then let my retort be, "then why is American Christianity still "American"!?!" In churches still it's all about "me" "consumerism" "individualism" oh hell, we even do our marketing and prey off my people's materialistic mindsets. It's the "frozen chosen" filling our pews here, and there's no sign of this label getting up and taking action. No, our church in American isn't successful, at best it's backwards, and at worst...bite my tongue, it's Satanic. All this to say, who in their right mind can look at American Christians and then look at the Bible and say we've got it more right than wrong. So I ask again, "Are we succeeding?"

Definitions and criteria of successful ministry meetings can be how was the "flow"/"organization" of the evening. Was it meeting's atmosphere "lively"/"vibrant." I suggest these and all other such criteria which follow these guidelines must be rejected. To turn a close ear to the Lord's heart I cannot let myself think that such words used to describe rock concerts also can be used to describe how successful a Christian large group meeting was.

Arrr, I'm not pirate, but I am frustrated. I am a fallen man without a map to God's heart. Or more exactly put, I have a map called the Bible, but I haven't ears to hear or eyes to read. I'm a sinner, not knowing the Holy Lord.